There was this boy I knew once and he was good looking, nice and insightful and I was in love with him, and sometimes, I wonder if he "got away".
Whenever I have a crush, I have the tendency to get all Sixteen Candles. I get all crazy "in love" when I've never had a conversation with the guy, and sigh, "He's so out of my league, anyway." So you see what the problem is. I idealize a somewhat good-looking guy until he's so perfect that he'd never lower himself to my level.
Ha! I'm self-delusional AND self-loathing. (I think it's funny, so it's okay for you to laugh.) Look! Self-discovery is fun!
What's inspiring this personal reflection? Unsure, really... Well, maybe I know, but it's embarrassing so it will be a secret. But I thought this pattern was worth mentioning, and one day surrendering, so I can be a little more of the person I should be.
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2 comments:
Esther I so relate to you! I have been wrestling with the very same struggle recently...and I have finally come to the conclusion that it just isn't right because I'm so obsessed with him. Their is someone else out their that is better for me. Someone who will not consume my thoughts as much as this 'guy'. It is a constant daily surrender, some days are good others not so much. Matters of the heart are much more difficult than trials and tribulations. That wasn't an original thought, I borrowed it from Elisabeth Elliot. Speaking of which have you seen the movie 'Beyond the Gates of Splendor'? Way cool dude! Definetly got to check it out, it made it to the the Sundance Festival, which I think is tres cool!
Adrienne
well, we can't just say "he's wrong because I like him so much", but i do agree, it's wise to take a step and evaluate your feelings and motives.
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